A Note

Last weekend I was all prepared to do a big blog post on being 28 weeks along and also wanted to take a picture of my growing belly.  Sadly, we didn’t get the opportunity to take our picture.  After finding out in July about Willow, it took me awhile to work through all of my emotions  I had to stop getting the pregnancy email updates and reading the pregnancy books. It made me sad.  Over the past month though, I had embraced how special and amazing an opportunity it is to carry a baby.  It has been the biggest dream of mine for a very long time.  During the last few weeks, I got to enjoy her kicking and sweet little movements.  I had friends tell me how cute my growing belly looked.  It was nice to be able to have some normal moments. 

During the past 6 weeks I have also been blessed by the support of everyone that surrounds me.  This has included my amazing team, everyone on staff at the school and my student’s parents.  I wanted to share one of my favorite letters.  It is from a father in my classroom and it truly touched me. 

Dear Stacey,

Y***** told me last night about your special pregnancy, I have always considered you and all of X’s teachers as members of our family and we are here for you if you need anything at all… one thought that I always keep in mind that, God carefully chooses highly blessed people to take care of the angels that come to this life, we are very lucky and fortunate to be chosen for this noble and blessed event..

Our thoughts and prayers are with you.. We are here for you and God bless you!

Willow Ann

 

Born into our arms, now waiting in heaven.

Willow Ann Scott

born on 9.24.10 at 5:08 pm. 

weighed 1 pound and was 11.5 inches long. 

Start of School

Christopher and I both started school last week.  He is in 7th grade and had to unfortunately go to the new middle school on the other side of our subdivision.  This year he has math, language arts, Texas history, science, tennis, multimedia and video production and art.  He likes his teachers and says that the new middle school is the nicest middle school he has ever seen.  So we are off to a good start!

I too had a good start to school.  I did share the news of Willow Ann with my staff as well as the parents of my students.  It wasn’t easy, but I am glad I did.  Everyone has been incredibly supportive.  I am truly blessed to work in the school that I do, with the team that I have and under the leadership of a very understanding principal. 

Sweetest Thing

I just had to get our little one a cute little outfit to wear at the hospital.  This picture doesn’t really show how small the dress is.  I couldn’t believe the size of it.  It is is sweet and heartbreaking all at the same time.  I have great hopes that she will get to at least one pound.  As of tomorrow, Willow will be 25 weeks.  We needed to get to 25 weeks so that a photographer from the organization Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep could come and take pictures or our family at the hospital.  I pray that it works out and they are able to come.

Special Package

String of Pearls is an amazing organization that offers support to families who have been given a fatal prenatal diagnosis.  I contacted the founder Laura over a month ago.  She quickly mailed out the most amazing package of keepsakes.  We were given an ornament that we can stamp a print of Willow’s feet on, a photo album and some plaster in which we can make prints of molds of both her hands and feet.  There was also a journal and book to help us through this time.  These are packed in the closet waiting her arrival.  Laura has also emailed me to let me know she is thinking of us.  These emails come at the most perfect times. 

A Little Something

My mom stopped by about 2 weeks ago to have some lunch before she and my dad left for a vacation.  She gave me this beautiful bracelet so that I would have something to remind me of Willow.  It is a small, delicate silver bracelet with a pink sapphire stone.  I have been wearing it a lot and absolutely love it!  Thank you Mom!

I Will Carry You

I came across the blog Bring the Rain a few years ago.  I read the words Angie Smith wrote about her daughter Audrey Caroline and thought it was just so sad.  Never did I think, I would be in the same position.  I am currently reading her book I Will Carry You.  Here is a song that her husband wrote for their daughter.  I warn you that if you watch the video be prepared with some Kleenex.  I watched it on Friday and when Steve got home he said “are you okay?”  My eyes were still a little red and puffy!  I think the song is just beautiful and completely captures how we feel. 

 

 

I Will Carry You by Selah

There were photographs I wanted to take,
Things I wanted to show you,
Sing sweet lullabys,
Wipe your teary eyes,
Who could love you like this?

People say that I am brave but I'm not,
Truth is I'm barely hangin' on,
There's a greater story
Written long before me,
Because He loves you like this.

Chours:
I will carry you,
While your heart beats here,
Long beyond the empty cradle,
Through the coming years,
I will carry you,
All my life,
I will praise the One,
Who's chosen me,
To carry you.

Bridge:
Such a short time,
Such a long road,
All this maddness,
But I know,
That the silence,
Has brought me to His voice,
And He said,

"I've shown her photographs of time beginning,
Walked her through the parted sea,
Angel lullabys,
No more teary eyes,
Who could love her like this?"

Chours:
I will carry you,
While your heart beats here,
Long beyond the empty cradle,
Through the coming years,
I will carry you,
All your life,
I will praise the One,
Who's chosen me,
To carry you.