Scrabble Fun

From my dear friend Erika…

The Cord

My friend Erika, found this poem and sent it to me.  I have read it before, but never posted it.  I think it is beautiful especially during this holiday season.  Steve and I survived the holidays.  Our hearts will always be broken and filled with what could have/should have been, but we are healing. 

The Cord

We are connected,
My child and I, by
An invisible cord
Not seen by the eye.
It's not like the cord
That connects us 'til birth
This cord can't been seen
By any on Earth.
This cord does it's work
Right from the start.
It binds us together
Attached to my heart.
I know that it's there
Though no one can see
The invisible cord
From my child to me.
The strength of this cord
Is hard to describe.
It can't be destroyed
It can't be denied.
It's stronger than any cord
Man could create
It withstands the test
Can hold any weight.
And though you are gone,
Though you're not here with me,
The cord is still there
But no one can see.
It pulls at my heart
I am bruised...I am sore,
But this cord is my lifeline
As never before.
I am thankful that God

Connects us this way
A mother and child
Death can't take it away!
Author Unknown

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas Willow Ann. 

 

Picture from Jen.  Thank you for thinking of us.

Silent Night

 

This week my principal presented me with this beautiful book along with a certificate.  The book will be added our school library and we can keep the certificate.  My principal has been incredibly supportive of me during the past several months.  She also understands the pain of losing a child.  She too lost her first daughter.  As she gave me the book, she told me how important it is to have items like this because it helps you know she existed.  She totally gets it.  I don’t get to have Willow here, so I like to have things that tell me she was real.  That the past 10 months really did happen. I took the book home and read it.  I love the song Silent Night.  It is the one part of Christmas that I am looking forward to.  I really want to go to Christmas Eve service and sing Silent Night as the congregation lights candles one by one.  The book and the sentiment is very meaningful. 

~ The certificate ~

~ The sticker on the inside of the book ~

Memory Ornament

My friend Ellen, sent me this beautiful ornament and the sweetest card.  She saw the ornament and thought of Me and Willow.  I think it is so beautiful.  Thank your for thinking or our family!

Special Books

My mother-in-law’s school donated several books to their library in Willow’s memory.  We feel so honored that they would think of her and us.  We hope they enjoy some of these book.

 

I actually purchased my own copy of Hello Willow so we could have it at our house.  The book I Heard Said the Bird is one of my personal favorites.  I read it to my class many times in the spring when Steve and I were the only ones who knew of little Willow.  It is the story of a new baby and it always put a smile on my face.  I haven’t been able to read it this year.  I am too afraid that it will make me cry, so I think it is better to avoid it.

12-7-2010

It should have been Willow’s birthday.  How I wish that I was holding her, but instead I am holding strong.  Instead of learning how to meet all of her needs, I am planning for a family vacation without her.  This is definitely not how I planned to spend my winter break.  We have broken hearts, but are doing fine.  Today though, I wish things were different.  I wish she were here with me

 

What Makes A Mother
Author Unknown
I thought of you and closed my eyes,
And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother,
And I know I heard him say:
A mother has a baby,
This we know is true.
But, God, can you be a mother,
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can he replied,
With confidence in his voice.
I give many women babies,
When they leave is not thier choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But theres no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared his throat,
And then I saw a tear.
I wish that I could show you,
What your child is doing today,
If you could see your child smile,
With other children who say:
We go to earth and learn our lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My mommy set me free.
I miss my mommy oh so much,
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
"Mommy don't be sad today, I'm your baby and I'm here."
So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are okay
Your babies are here in My home
And this is where they'll stay
They'll wait for you with Me
Until your lessons there are through
And on the day that you come home
they'll be at the gates waiting for you
So now you see
What makes a Mother
It's the feeling in your heart
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start

Her Ornament

This isn’t how I pictured spending Christmas this year.  I had visions of going to the mall to see Santa with my new little one and my dad.  Of having a big Christmas dinner with our families and enjoying the holidays as  family of four.  This won’t be happening this year.  Instead I bought Willow an ornament that will hang in her memory.  I had been looking for the perfect ornament to add to our tree for her this year.  I found it at Things Remembered and think it is perfect!  Thankfully the lady that waited on me didn’t ask questions, because I am pretty sure I would have cried.

 

Much Needed

Tonight I got this email from Mary.  It held this photo.  I needed it today. 

 

http://micahsgift.blogspot.com/

Dear Stacey,

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Willow. She is so beautiful! Thank you for sharing her with me. She has touched my heart. She is such a strong girl. I don't even know her, but I am so proud of her. She held on and made sure that she met her mommy and daddy before she left for Heaven. That is one strong little girl. I am so blessed to have read her story. She will forever have a place in my heart. Thank you for letting me write her name for you. It truly is an honor. I have attached her photo to the bottom of this email. I hope you like it. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Love,

Mary

 

Thank you Mary for your sweet words.  The photo and message came on a day that I needed to hear it and see her name.  Thank you.